First Christmas
I Samuel 2:18-20, 26; Luke 2:41-52; Colossians 3:12-17
No one remembers their own birth.
Even though I know that I was born on Friday the 13 th at Naeve Hospital in Albert Lea, Minnesota. And I know that the night I was born it was a hot summer night and my mother's youngest sister was at the midnight classic fright film spectacular showing of the movie Frankenstein with Boris Karloff. My aunt knew that I had been born because after the movie she drove by the hospital and saw my father's car parked on the street. I know all this about my birth, not as a personal memory, but as a story that was told to me years later. None of us can remember our birth or even our first or second birthdays.
Psychologists refer to this phenomenon as "childhood amnesia" and they tell us that the earliest childhood memories that any of us have are most often from around our third or fourth years of life. Women generally tend to have earlier and more vivid memories than men, but even most women cannot go back before age two and a half. Furthermore, research has revealed that for most of us our earliest memories are actually based only in part on memory with the rest of what we think is memory being amplified or modified by descriptions provided by our parents, siblings, relatives or other sources. What I always thought to be one of my earliest memories was me standing in the basement apartment where my parents lived for the first few years they were married and I lived for the first two years of my life. At least I thought that was my earliest memory until one day a few years ago when I ran across an old, old picture of myself standing by an ancient black and white television in that basement apartment and I realized that the picture I had always had in my mind as a memory of that apartment was really a memory of this old picture taken when I was around two years old.
Memory is selective, although not always of events or moments of our choosing. What we would choose to remember is not always what others remember about us. How we would choose to be remembered is not always how the story is retold. This past holiday weekend was a time once again of many family gatherings and that usually includes the sharing of stories from the past. Some of the stories that were told recalled happy times or funny incidents. Some of the stories retold were intended to provide insight or establish the nature of the changing times. But on several occasions over the last few weeks I know I heard at least a couple stories retold that I know not everyone in the room wanted told. What is funny or meaningful to a parent is often embarrassing or demeaning to an adult child. What is offered as a story to demonstrate growing maturity by a young adult may be simply heard as "too much information" for the parent hearing it for the first time. Sometimes we learn more about the story teller by what memory they choose to share and how they choose to share it then we do about the subject of the story. We remember by retelling the story but the story is also remembered differently as our life experiences, emotions and even the listening audience changes. The meanings and values we might think we are preserving by retelling the story of a childhood may over time reveal both the strengths and the weaknesses of the values we thought we held. Many a "humorous" story has become over time less funny and sometimes painfully sad because of the suffering or even abuse of some character in the story. We may call it "political correctness" when we reframe some stories today but it may also be a sign of our growing understanding of our own struggles with racism, sexism and our socio-economically advantaged lives. It is good to take time to reflect with the family on the past, to see what we can learn from the memories and how we might have grown to appreciate new truths revealed in those memories. Some stories are shared stories. Shared by generations as witness to the foundations of our faith. The reason for the holiday and family gatherings of the past few weeks, is, of course, the retelling of the origins of our faith family story. Christmas is a story that begins the faith journey for most Christians. All the Old Testament stories, prophecies and teachings are conditioned and interpreted for the Christian through their understanding of who Jesus was and what Jesus did. That story begins with his birth. Now the fact is that the Bible contains very few stories about the childhood of Jesus. Even the birth story is limited to two of the four Gospels and these two nativity stories differ significantly in their focus and content. The familiar Christmas story we heard read again this Christmas Eve from Luke tells of angels and shepherds but makes no mention of the Wise men. The Gospel of Matthew has Wise Men but makes no mention of the shepherds or a manger. The Matthean Gospel tells of Joseph and Mary fleeing into Egypt to protect the new born child from a blood thirsty King Herod and then returning to raise Jesus in Nazareth of Galilee. Luke highlights different events, focusing instead on the dedication and circumcision of Jesus after which the story then jumps to our lesson for today. Twelve years have passed in the telling of the story of Jesus. Today's story, in fact, is the only story of Jesus' childhood preserved in the Gospels. This is a rather significant fact that did not escape the attention of many in the early Christian church. About 100 years after the death of Jesus a variety of writers took it upon themselves to create, perhaps with the help of some oral tradition, stories of Jesus' childhood. Much like the stories of other great figures of history, it is difficult to know how much of each story retold is based in fact and how much is legend. This appears to be a very human endeavor, that is true even of figures from American history. We are pretty sure, for example, that George Washington never chopped down a cherry tree but we are not so sure about his throwing a coin across the Potomac River. We are pretty sure that Johnny Appleseed did not plant every apple tree west of the Appalachian Mountains but we also do know that John Chapman planted thousands of apple trees over the course of his life. A variety of stories were written about the childhood years of Jesus beginning 100 years after his death which are now identified by scholars as apocryphal writings. There were stories of Jesus helping around his father's carpenter shop and miracles performed while playing with his toys. Some of the stories may have been grounded in real events while others clearly reflected the wishful thinking of those who believed in him. The only story to make it into the Bible is our lesson for today. Jesus at the age of twelve going to Jerusalem with his parents to celebrate the Passover. It used to be thought by some scholars that the story was a retelling of a bar mitzvah journey until research determined that there was no ritual like a bar or bat mitzvah in the first century. Furthermore, the bar mitzvah age was and is 13 years and one month, not twelve.
So what is the purpose of this one story about the adolescent Jesus? Why was this story remembered and retold when all the rest were forgotten or ignored? Every parent has the one or two stories they tell about their children. Unfortunately the stories are not of our choosing but usually are some how significant to the parent for what we would probably consider to be all the wrong reasons. As I consider the stories that I have heard told by parents over the years I realize that one of the common threads in all of them is a desire to reveal something human about the child. That often takes the form of some incident that is potentially embarrassing exactly because it is so human. We know nothing with historical certainty about the childhood of Jesus. Was he a perfect child who never did anything wrong? He was, after all, the son of God. The one who had no sin. Yet he was also born into our world as a human being. We do not know whose memory of Jesus is at the source of this story. Was it one of his relatives, a close family friend or maybe even his mother? What we do know is that our lesson for today places Jesus in the complex setting of a world where even when your actions are perfectly good and well intentioned the results may not be perfectly good. Mary and Joseph brought Jesus, as our texts says they did, every year, to celebrate the Passover in Jerusalem. A young boy on the edge of adolescence traveling to Jerusalem with the women and children but perhaps expecting to return walking with the men and boys, he was on the brink of this 13 th year. So it is not surprising that on the return trip home, Mary assumes Jesus is with Joseph and the other male travelers while Joseph assumes Jesus is with the women and children. We can almost hear that fateful moment when husband and wife said to each other, "I thought he was with you." Any parent who has had the experience knows how the initial reaction to the missing child, especially if they are an adolescent, is anger at their irresponsible behavior. This anger gradually grows into rage at the inconvenience and trouble they are causing you. But as the search for the missing teen yields no solution the rage moves increasingly toward panic and fear as you begin to imagine the worst that could have happened while clinging to hope. Somewhere around this time you also begin to pray for the safety of the child and you begin to want to make deals with God. Three days looking for a child, even a perfect child, will put a parent through a lot of emotional and psychological trauma. Then comes the conclusion to the search. The parents rightly exclaim, "How could you have put us through an experience like this?" to which Jesus replies, "What did you expect?"
There is amazing honesty and truth in this story for each of us. It is very unlikely that any of us spent the last week looking for Jesus. We pretty much expect him to be where we left him last weekend, in the manger. And this past week has probably not been particularly eventful which is also what we expect of the week after Christmas.. But the humanity of Jesus we celebrated Christmas Eve is now about to break in upon us. The baby did not stay in the manger and the good feelings we had about Christmas are being revised with our New Year's resolutions. Does it matter if we know nothing about the childhood of Jesus? What is the moment that defines a life? What is the moment that defines each of our lives? Our lesson for today points to the moment that will give ultimate meaning to the life of the Christ and our lives. It is a moment that can be seen only from the comfort of our future position. "Did you not know that I must be in my Father's house?" Was this the ah-ha moment when Jesus realized he was the son of God or is this the obvious clue for each of us to keep our eyes on this Jesus? The story is a story. It is not a historically detailed news report, but there seem to be lessons learned. A missing child is safely found. The safety of God's house is the place to be. The son was obedient from that day forward. And he increased in wisdom and divine and human favor. This is a Christmas story of a beginning. Something is planted within those who hear this story. Maybe it is a desire to grow with this Jesus, to journey with him, to discover where it is that faith will lead.
What will you remember about this Christmas? Was there a defining story? What did you expect? We need to be careful of our expectations and the limits they place on us. One of my favorite stories is a simple one of the six year old son who was getting ready for the Christmas Eve dinner with family and guests. He was warned several times that he was expected to be on his best behavior. That it was important that he be the young man he was expected to be. He was dressed in his new sweater and pants and seated on a full size dining room chair. He was careful to pick up his napkin and followed carefully every move his father was making. As the meal began he reached for the rolls and knocked over his water glass. He froze in terror and looked wide eyed at his father. There eyes met and then the father reached forward and knocked over his own glass. Together they went to get towels. We come to the table with expectations--expectations of judgment and the hope for the smile of grace. This morning there are those who have been searching for Jesus, many for more than three days. This morning there are those who have found Jesus again. This morning there are those who meet Jesus again and are not sure what to think and he says, "What did you expect?" What did you expect? Let me tell you a story, about a God who so loved the world, that he...Well, you know where the story began, don't forget how it ends.
Amen